People want to think about having balance in their lives, but a better way to think about it is being intentional instead. Being in balance basically means to intentionally, no matter how hard it is, choose how you will show up under any given circumstance.
I always have to chuckle at the thought of balance because of song lyrics. John Mellencamp has a song titled, “Between a Laugh and a Tear.” One of the lines of that song says,
“I know there’s a balance, I see it when I swing past.” So, I’ve always had that vision in my mind of swinging past and looking at it. You can listen to it here. It’s not my usual style of music, but I have my moods.
But, in reality, we can work towards it, even if we never perfectly find it.
How can you work towards balance?
• Move through your emotions quickly – it’s normal to become emotional when the roller coaster of life gets too fast and too furious. Feel what you need to feel but move quickly on to the next step. The next step after feeling something is to take action. If something doesn’t feel right, chances are it isn’t right. The next logical step to create more space in your life for fulfilling goals and time for enjoyment is action. Be proactive with your life.
• Stop regurgitating facts and stories repeatedly – the more you talk about what happened, how unfair it was, and what a nuisance it was, the more energy you expend. This energy could be used for better purposes. You can brainstorm an answer to the problem and you can spend that much more time enjoying your life, setting and achieving goals.
• Get proactive, instead of reactive – If you find yourself faced with a problem, take the energy needed to look for solutions rather than dwell only on the issue at hand. We all use energy to get through the day’s events. However, we get to choose how much energy is spent on each project. Look at your life, what is going well? Do you have an amazing successful career or education? If so, then you might be spending all of your time and energy in that one area and the rest of your life is completely out of balance from family to personal relationships.
Sometimes, the unexpected can throw you off. How do you hit the reset button when life throws you a curve and knocks you off balance? Sometimes truthfully, no matter how hard we try not to dwell on something, we fall back into patterns of thinking and talking about something.
What do you do when you’re stuck in a negative mindset?
- Call a friend or get an accountability partner.
- Ask someone you know to reroute you when you are stuck. Ask them not to let you dwell on what happened or what you cannot control and help you return to present moment status.
Sometimes all it takes is someone to remind you that, in this present moment, you are fine. You might not have the answers to what will happen in the future, but you can be present in this moment.
- Make a choice and make some change. If you really want to achieve your goals and enjoy life to the fullest, you must choose where your energy will go. Make a choice that seems best in the moment and follow through with it.
If it doesn’t work out, try something else. There is always other choices. You may not like all the choices, but staying stuck won’t ever work. Make a choice with the information you have in front of you and take action steps toward that choice.
You will find yourself a little more balanced, until a more optimal choice presents itself. At least you are not standing still and you are taking action steps toward a solution. Feeling overwhelmed leads to a feeling of being off-balance.
Remember: It is okay to be out of balance. Sometimes there’s a big project at work or a special event at home. You are out of balance because that event or project takes priority. A special event, like a wedding for example, takes a lot of time, but it will eventually be over. A home repair or project will come to completion, as well. An annual meeting at work will soon be nothing but a distant memory.
Sometimes it’s your season to work like a dog to get the job done. You can regain balance when the immediate project is finished.
Don’t forget, even in the chaos, you can still create a daily habit of taking one small actionable step toward a personal goal, dream, or desire.
All the best,
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